I think about the passage in Matthew where Jesus tells us that the mouth speaks out of the abundance of the heart. It's like an overflow of a dam -- our words reflect what is within us. The more grace and wisdom we take in from God, the more we reflect that back to the world, and in the same way, when we do not invest in our relationship with God, it's easy to be less gracious to others, because when we understand the grace God has extended to us and root ourselves in this daily, we're more likely to be gracious to others.
This is why Paul is telling the Ephesians that the thief should no longer steal -- if he continues to steal after converting to Christianity, it's evidence that his conversion isn't very deep. In the same way, we're called to treat one another in a way that reflects the work the Holy Spirit is doing in our own lives, thus reflecting the grace of God to the world.
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