The Secret Race (Tyler Hamilton)

   Every once in a while, I come across a book that is absolutely amazing, even moreso because I wasn't expecting it to be so engaging.  The most recent example I can think of is David McCullough's The Wright Brothers.  I read it because I figured it was an important part of American history I should know about, especially living in Ohio, but I didn't think the story would be so engaging.  Couldn't put it down. If you haven't read it, you should.  It's way better than whatever else is in this blog post.  (I'm nominating that for the understatement of the year.)

  I picked up Tyler Hamilton's The Secret Race from the library, and it sucked me in.  I couldn't stop reading it.  Like everyone else on the planet, I was completely caught up in Lance Armstrong's domination of the Tour de France.  I'm not a serious cyclist (I own a bicycle, but the thought of riding 57 miles in the upcoming Pelotonia fundraiser for cancer research this fall intimidates me.  But you should donate to my ride anyway.), but Lance's story was so captivating.  The guy who recovered from cancer to dominate an event that demands a herculean effort from any participant -- how could you not support that?  I remember waiting for updates every day, being amazed at the times an American was posting in a sport that had been dominated by Europeans, with the exception of Greg LeMond.  

  I was staunchly on team Lance when it came to accusations of doping.  Plus, the denials were so bold.  How could you not believe someone who denied accusations so confidently?  And I figured that someone who had survived cancer would be extra sensitive about what went into his body.  I always assumed that doping was a minority in the sport, and that it was possible to win without doping. (USADA later revealed that I was wrong to believe that Armstrong won without doping.)

  Tyler Hamilton, who rode with Lance in several Tours, tells his side of the story in an honest way.  It's incredibly transparent.  In Hamilton's view, no one could win these events without doping -- it simply wasn't possible.  All the best riders were doping, and so one had to dope to compete.  If you wanted to build a successful career in cycling, you had to do it.  It was black or white.

  And if you're in those shoes, what do you do?  How do you react when faced with the choice of doping or not?  Do you give up what you've been working towards?  Or do you take something that makes you better?  The pressure is immense.  

  Reading Hamilton's book made me feel sorry for those put in that position.  It was never an easy choice.  To hold onto your dreams mean you had to sacrifice.  In the end, Hamilton paid a huge price. His decision cost him an immense amount.  It's easy to look back now and think about how different choices could have led down different paths.  It's easy to look in from the outside and say what he should have done.  

  But there, in that moment, when presented with that choice...  

  That's a hard place to be.

  And Hamilton's book helps me think a little more and have a little more mercy for those who make the wrong decision under pressure.  I think that's a good thing.