Thanksgiving

  I have a lot to be thankful for this year.

  It's been a pretty amazing year.  One year ago, I was having dinner on the island of Kauai with my wife, mother and sister.  It seems like a long time ago.  We found out in February that Rachel was pregnant with Caleb, and everything since then seems like a bit of a blur, with occasional days filled in for color along the way.  I remember the ultrasounds, the overwhelming sense of wonder that washed over each of us.  I remember my mother yelling when she called after she had gotten our package in the mail informing her of her new & upgraded status as grandmother.  I remember looking at Rachel at some point in early September and realizing just how pregnant she was.  I remember the sheer sense of unreality when I woke up at 2:00 in the morning and realized that Rachel was about to have a baby.  All of it has led to this day, this moment.

  But of course, God started to lay the groundwork for these precious moments long ago.  God has been at work in my life since before I was born, since before I was old enough to utter any words of faith, since before I realized how much God loved me.  God has been at work for years, for decades, reminding me of his love and surrounding me with amazing, gracious people who have helped me make it this far--not a single step was taken on my own, without the support and encouragement of so many.  And, of course, God has been there for every breath, every heartbeat.

  It hasn't all been easy, nor has it always been fun.  There are more tears in my past than I would have chosen, and there are people that I would desperately love to have back, even for one day.  I don't suppose I'll ever get over that sense of loss, no matter how wonderful the memories are.  That's just a part of life, I guess.

  I have also had the habit of making some not-so-wise decisions, and in so doing I made my own path a lot harder.  But again, those amazing people have helped me see that the road I was on led only one way, and it was not the way I intended to trod.  So with a helping hand and a lot of grace, I have tried (and failed, so often) to restore my feet to the path that leads to life.

  But only God can do that.  And God has blessed me so richly.

  This was Caleb's first Thanksgiving, and it was a grand occasion.  It marked his debut at the church, and he managed not to cry so loudly that not a single thought could be thunk, and he managed not to introduce himself to soon-to-be-friends through any bodily functions.  For both, we are grateful.

  We feasted at the church, surrounded by family and friends, and as we watched our son be rocked in the arms of a woman who knows a good bit more about raising children than we do, we were grateful.  Simply grateful.

  For what?

  For love.  For the love of a Savior.  For the love of God that is made manifest in the love of so many people.  For the love we have for a child.  For the love God has for that child.  For the promise of eternal love.

  So much love has been poured out, and it is my heartfelt and solemn prayer that I might spend my life pouring love out upon others as a way to say thank you to the one who has always and will always love me more than I can ever understand.