Vexing Questions

  I've been struggling lately.  Mostly, because of two reasons that turn me more and more cynical each day.

  1)  Most people who show up at the church claiming to be hungry are incredibly disappointed when I offer them food.

  2)  The next call from outside the congregation for emergency pastoral care that doesn't end when I say we don't have money to give away will be the first.

  These two facts have me wrestling with how I respond to those in need.  First of all, it convinces me more and more of the importance of working through established agencies to help those in true need--their screening abilities and economies of scale make them far more effective than we could ever hope to be.

  But it feels like the church should exist to help meet the needs of the community.  At times, we have a small amount of money available to give out, but most of the results of giving that money away have been so disheartening and discouraging that it doesn't even seem like good stewardship of that small amount of money.  The few encouraging experiences I've had in helping those who seemed to be truly in need were shattered when those people turned up not long after with a different story (and sometimes a different name), completely forgetting that we had helped them before, and rather defensive when they were reminded that they had been here before.

  So what to do?  Do we help everyone and expend every resource of the church to help those who call, trusting that we will meet some genuine needs?  Do we help no one, turning away those with genuine need as well as anyone else who calls?  Neither feels quite right or particularly faithful.  I've been burned enough times that I'm skeptical of everyone, whether they deserve it or not.  I want to trust, I want to believe, but a voice in the back of my head makes me question every story.

  What would Jesus have me do?  As the author of all wisdom, he certainly knew what everyone's true need was.  He knew that we were all equally sinful, that I am no different than those who call the church.  He could offer a deeper and more important help than I could ever dream to offer.  He sees hope in every situation, and loves each one of us deeply.

  I struggle to follow his footsteps, to discern his wisdom for me, to understand how best to deal with those in need--there's a need, even if it isn't the one to which they give voice.  How do I be a good steward of the church's, and of my own, resources, obeying Christ's command to help those in need while still discerning those simply trying to take advantage of the church's generosity?

  For wisdom, Lord, I pray.  For I simply don't seem to be able to find the answers to these questions.