So it begins...

And so the journey begins... On or around October 3, life will change forever, for the better, and yet here I stand, humbly aware of the responsibility that awaits.

It seems like they should have a test for parenthood, as though being put in charge of a human life is a big enough responsibility that you shouldn't simply qualify because can be a parent. I went through more to get a driver's license. I've can't buy a beer without the proper identification--and yet in eight months, Rachel & I will suddenly have the largest responsibility in our lives--the task of safeguarding and guiding a small child into adulthood.

I am in awe of everything that happens. The mere biology of it is amazing enough, but to think that God can create a human being out of one cell boggles the mind.

I have never been more excited in my life about the years that await. I have no idea what I'm getting into, except for the fact that I will go into it without much sleep, and yet the sheer thought of being a father means more to me than words can express. It is a day, a moment I have looked forward to for years, and now that it draws near, has a date, I simply grin at the ineffable experience of watching a child grow.

I find myself praying in the dark of night, while Rachel sleeps, hoping that this child will grow safely into a Godly child. I pray for the child, and I pray for us, that we will shine with the light of Christ, with the light of His love, and that He will know God through our love. I pray that we will continue to grow, that God will guide us, and that the church will be blessed by this child. I pray that I will mature, that I will look past my selfishness and pour out love upon this child, whatever that may take.

Late at night, I stare at the ceiling, wondering about the days to come. I am told that the heart formed last week, and that eyelids now cover its eyes. Eyelids! Who gets excited about eyelids? I do now. I imagine fingers forming, curling and uncurling, as life courses through this child. I don't know how, but I trust in God, that all will work out well. We walk blindly into an unknown future, but always in the palm of God's hand, and trust that the light of Christ will lead us onward.