The Dentist

  Do you know how awkward it is when you're at the dentist and they keep asking you questions, while at the same time jamming as many different and varied instruments as possible into your mouth as though it were a competition with cash prizes?  I've always wondered if it were possible for a visit to the dentist to be more awkward than the one where I'm constantly trying to elucidate complex sentences in grunts and groans.

  I've now discovered that, yes, it is possible.  What could be more awkward?

  A visit to the dentist where the hygienist spends an inordinate amount of time with her hands and various dental instruments shoved in your mouth and yet, in that time, says nothing to you.

  Strange.

  Perhaps it started poorly.  When I walked into the area with the dental chair, I was somewhat astonished to find a television back there showing some sort of daytime talk show.  (Are any of them different?)  The hygienist handed me the remote, telling me I could find something I liked, and then turned around to enter something into a computer.  I knew exactly what I wanted from the TV.  I lifted the remote, clicked the 'off' button, and was greeted by the blissful blank screen.  I don't need television intruding into the dental chair.  The hygienist seemed a bit surprised when I handed her back the remote and explained that I didn't like television.  Maybe that's why she didn't speak to me.  Or, perhaps I'm simply not very interesting.  (A high possibility)  Either way, it was beyond awkward to have someone spend that much time staring into my mouth and say nothing.

  I just thought I'd share that.  Who doesn't love hearing stories about other people's dental visits?